The world of Chi-Ting has been rocked by scandalous and salacious news ...
Sister Klaus and local Khal Drogo look-a-like, Shunya, have become ensnared in un amour interdit. (Shunya is famed as one of the legendary Gang of 4 who were dragged through the courts by psychotic Radha Ma loyalists for supposedly causing her to commit suicide). The Sister's former paramour, Sven, has been seen in Ramana Nagar renting his clothes while wailing and lamenting the cruel vicissitudes of fate. It had been noted of late that Shunya - despite his macho visage and raunchy mega-Enfield bike - has taken to riding around town in a dress with a suspicious hint of eyeliner and mascara. Rumours have also been circulating about him after Sister K's brief foray into the twilight world of Facebook. Apparently Shunya has been bombarding the Sister with multiple "Friend" requests. (Facebook as is self evident to every common or garden imbecile is the portal to all infamy and perversion!) Shunya's liebchen, Sexy Steffi, has been so distraught at these ugly rumours that she has immediately booked a flight from Frankfurt to confront her lover about his alarming sexual metamorphosis.
Sister Klaus, when cornered by the growing media firestorm, enigmatically said - "je ne regrette rien" - and refused to comment further ...
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Of course no comment on these absurd and laughable cock and bull accusations. But on another note, is that Khal Drogo creep not one of the worst actors in that abominably bad TV series - Game of Thrones - also known as Game of Drones? After struggling through the first episode, I found it even worse than watching 10 minutes of the Texas Chain Saw Massacre (suggested by Kevinji as one of his all time favourite movies). It was really very bad. Watching Thrones brought up emotions in me like seeing one of those fucking Obama drones killing one possible insurgent and also 12 children (who were then labelled as "collateral damage"). Zum kotzen!
ReplyDeleteNow, I know all about the Chi-Ting Master's fixation for B (and even C) movie slasher porn ... but that he could sink so low as to bringing up this infamous and lousy, nondescript factotum Drogo - and connect him with a nice guy like Shunya - is intolerable and utterly disgusting.
L'amour interdit exists only in your dazed and confused head, Swami, and says a lot about how you are struggling with your sex life, according to our old friend Sigmund Freud.
Ha ha, I call this series Game of Bones, because the acting is so stiff - as dry as a bone - however the story is actually quite good. Agree with Sis Klaus that Kevji's sexual energy must have gone all wrong in a tantric session. He's really gone astray. Writing all these very long, difficult posts have made him rather mad. He could be successful writing silly gems like this post, but he persists in trying to reach for the impossible ... poor fellow.
ReplyDeleteAhhhh!!! Spring springs even in Tiru and Lord Krsna's Cosmic Mating Season will not be forestalled. Brahmas' intergalactic yin yang-ing will not be muzzled by mere mortals in fancy robes and pointy hats. Each time a bee enters those perfumed petals, does not the Blessed Lord shiver with pure Ananda? Each time a single, solitary sperm wiggles its way into the holy egg, can you not feel Shiva's ecstasy? When the uncountable trillions of stars of two whole galaxies collide and intertwine ... oh WOW! ... where's that cold shower ...? How happy and delighted I am to hear that our dear Itster Klaus is getting its fair share of vitamin F. It is right and just. The fact that this is all accomplished using tacky leatherette outfits, snappy little whips and collar chokers ... procured over the internet, from some sleazy German porn outfitter ... is no business of mine. Who is to judge Krsna's choice of gopis? There are those that find two slimy slugs, backing into each other by the side of a mud puddle, filthy and offensive. Personally, it just makes me want to rip my clothes off and dive right in ... Which reminds me to inquire once again ... "Who Am I"? OM SHANTI y'all ...
ReplyDeleteBREAKING NEWS ... Sister Klaus (alias Manikandan) has confessed to murder: see here. Chi-Ting devotee David Godot has already donated the princely sum of 50 paise towards the legal defence fund while former amour Shunya has offered 2 pieces of broccoli and a turnip. Rather bizarrely, the Sister claimed to be 24 years old on her arrest - though we all know her real age is closer to 84! (These policemen must be totally blind!) The Divine It has defiantly announced that she will continue blogging from death row until the noose tightens around her scrawny neck. So please send loadsamoney - as it is disgustingly expensive to smuggle a laptop into an Indian jail.
ReplyDeleteYours HH Kevinandaji
PS All financial assistance should be addressed to the "Kevinanda is fucking off to Hawaii fund!"
My Dear Chi-Ting Master,
ReplyDeleteWith reference to your BREAKING NEWS, I think there must have been a mixup of some kind. Our own beloved Sister cannot be the one who killed the child. It must have been another transgendered one. I am quite sure of this. The crime described cannot have been carried out by the Sister.
The reason for my certainty is that last Tuesday I happened (just by chance) to meet up with the Sister and to have snapped her picture. (Click here to see it)
As is obvious, this is the Sister wearing one of her favourite festive red saris with her long Indian hair wig. She has also henna-tattooed herself with mystical tantric face decorations and displays an assortment of baubles and bangles in anticipation (no doubt) of enjoying a spicy private evening adventure in TVmalai. I am therefore relieved to report that our own dear Sister Klaus must not have been the one arrested and that she will not be subjected to incarceration.
With fondest wishes,
Yours ever,
Myles O'Blarney
Verdammte Scheisse. Another fucking blow below the waist right in my delicate private parts by that loathsome Chi-Ting Master - who apparently is so annoyed with having only 3 comments on his silly post that he resorts to the worst form of journalism - insinuations and bloody lies (and nasty ones they are too!) Thanks Myles for backing me up, even though I consider you a complete idiot ... Chapeaux!
ReplyDeleteI demand a full and honest apology for your inhuman behaviour Mr Chi-Ting. If you fail to do so, I will open a little book about your unhealthy interest in very young children and your sexual escapades with corpses, which will undoubtedly open the eyes of your beloved devotees ...
Well, well if it ain't the Myra Hindley of T.V.Malai! I knew there was something dodgy going on at the last Chi-Ting office party, when you went peroxide blonde and started carrying an ice pick in your handbag! As for my nocturnal visits to graveyards, there is a long and honourable lineage of tantrics (including Padmasambhava) who have been up for a bit of late night ghoulish. So suck on that Mullet Face!
ReplyDeleteSHAPESHIFTING APITAKUCHAMBALAMMAL!
ReplyDeleteIs Arunachala located in Middle Earth?
My Dear Chi-Ting Master,
When I exposed the Sister's photograph to an electric arc into which was being fed a small amount of Shiva Bhagram vibhutti an amazing transformation of the image took place. Fortunately I was able to capture this on film. Click here to see.
Perhaps someone can explain.
Yours as ever,
Myles O'Blarney
So Sister Klaus is a shapeshifting cyborg, with butch attachments - David Icke was right!
ReplyDeleteMORE BREAKING NEWS ...
ReplyDeleteAs you can read here in this article in The Times of India, there is no evidence whatsoever of a transgender being involved in this heinous crime. Instead a young man was arrested locally, named Manikandan aka Swami Kevinanda (a fake Swami with an interest in young children known for dwelling at burning places; gambling and losing huge sums of money; and borrowing money and never paying it back. That is probably how he got the name Cheating Master). His treacherous attack on the Silly Sister is therefore a very mean and perfidious cover up for his own crimes. It is he who is blogging from his abode in Tiruvannamalai high security prison, probably with the assistance of his partner in crime, the notorious murderess Lucrezia Borgia. No fucking off to Hawaii for Kevinanda, only sweating in a 6 by 6 feet cell with a small skylight and an old postcard of Honolulu beach with some dancing girls on the wall. Well, we all apparently get what we deserve and need in this life ...
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ReplyDeleteTransgendered human has a Near-Death-Experience.
S(he) is coming out of the “spiritual closet” in this video, confessing something that would raise the eyebrows of her neighbours, if they ever found out. Even her father does not know that she has had an NDE.
S(he) says “There’s something much, much more awesome [coming] after this disgusting earth“.
IMHO, what she needs now is a pint of the plain, and someone to natter with. But never mind. Have a look for yourself.
Yours as ever,
Myles O'Blarney
Our favourite psycho-sister Garbage Gal Bobbie has been seen marching to the organic shop with a pink rubbish bin full of bloody entrails! Apparently she has just had another "landlord drama" and like her grandmother, Lizzie Borden, she gave the heartless rogue 30 whacks before disposing of the bodyparts on nearby wasteland!
ReplyDelete